© Ayo Omolayo
“Cris why all these investigative questions? It’s not as if you have not given us money before?” Bunmi said.
She and Maggie were in my office and asked for a financial support from my end.
They claimed a friend’s relative was about to bury her late mum and they were all to contribute towards giving their mum a befitting burial.
They needed 1.5 million naira. That wasn’t a problem with me.
“It’s alright. Let me do a transfer right away”, I replied and took my phone.
“CRIS WOULD YOU STOP THAT?” Came the gentle whisper.
“Daddy!” I paused in my tracks.
“HAVE YOU SORT FOR YOUR FIANCEE’S PERMISSION?”
“I’m sorry sir!”
“DO THAT RIGHT AWAY! GIVE HIM A CALL”, He replied.
I quickly dialed Silas phone number and he picked.
“Hello Charming Silas!” I said smiling.
“Hi, Christiana! I’m so happy to hear from you again. How is work?”
“Hmmmmm! It’s a bit stressful!” I replied.
“I’m sorry about that! Please don’t forget to meet me when it’s break”.
“I always look forward to seeing your handsome face”, I said grinning.
The girls were now watching me with smiles on their faces.
I turned my office chair sideways to avoid their pestering eyes.
“Christy, I always look forward to hearing your voice. It sounds so heavenly. We’re you a chorister before?”
“No sir! I’ve never been a choirister. I only sing for pleasure at my leisure time. But most times when I sing, I sing for my Dad in the night”.
“Our Dad”, he replied.
“Yes, our Dad!”
“So would you love to sing for Charming Silas one of these days?”
“Why would I refuse. I only have one problem”, I said giggling.
“What is that?”
“I’ll be too shy to sing for you”, I replied.
“Oh my goodness!” He said admist laughter.
I started laughing too, but soon my eyes caught a glimpse of the ladies watching me. That was how I realized myself that I had called Silas so I could attend to them. How did I get carried away?
“NA LOVE NA”,
“Wait a second! Daddy, did you speak pidgin English just now?”
“YES I DID! IS THERE ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT?”
“Wait ooo! Daddy, you’re speaking pidgin English? This is impossible”.
“IMPOSSIBLE AS IN HOW?”
“Ha! How would you speak pidgin English? You’re supposed to speak King James English. Thou art worthy and stuffs like that”,
“SEE YOUR MOUTH! WHO CREATED LANGUAGES IN THE FIRST PLACE?”
“You did!”
“SO PIDGIN ENGLISH WAS NOT PART OF THE LANGUAGES I CREATED ABI?”
” No sir”, I replied giggled
“YOUR PEOPLE DEY WAIT YOU OOO!”
“Aah! Sorry! Charming, some of my friends are asking for my financial support. They want it for a particular burial ceremony coming up in two months time. Am I free to send them the money?”
“Oh! That would be nice, but I don’t want you to give anyone anything right now”, he said.
I was shocked. Normally, I would have given it to them without wasting time. They were used to always getting money from me whenever they needed it. What excuse would I give to these girls for disappointing them?
“My own money for that matter? Jesus, is this what being a submissive wife is all about? I cannot spend my own money they way I wanted. Wow! I have so much to learn. Daddy, what should a submissive wife do in a situation like this? Giving money is not wrong ooo. But my husband is not convinced about giving out the money as I am. What should I do?”
“YOU BEG YOUR HUSBAND ON BEHALF OF YOUR FRIENDS”, Came the gentle whisper.
“Ha! Beg? On top my own money again? No be you get am ooo! Na me get am, I just say make i inform you ooo!”
“OF COURSE! AND MAKE SURE YOU BEG HOM VERY WELL BECAUSE I MIGHT NOT TOUCH HIS HEART TO PERMIT YOU. SO DO THE BEGGING TO MY SATISFACTION”.
“Ah! Daddy why na?”
“TO TEACH YOU HUMILITY”
I smiled as it was clear to me I still had a level of pride in me because of my financial freedom. It made me feel I could do whatever I want whenever I wanted it. But here was God breaking me into a submissive wife.
“Daddy I thank you for your love towards me. Please carry your hammer and break me very well. Break every single pride in me. Break me oh Lord! Till all that is left of me is humility and the virtues of a submissive wife. Daddy, don’t use wood, use hammer and crush my pride! I am ready!” I prayed within me.
“CRIS, DO YOU KNOW THE GRAVITY OF WHAT YOU’RE SAYING? I’M BREAKING YOU WITH WOOD AND YOU ARE DARING ME TO USE HAMMER. YOU GO RUN OOO!”
“Run go where? No be Cris dey talk? Your baby girl oooo! Use hammer! Nack me very well! Hit me!”
“NO I CAN’T! YOU WON’T SURVIVE IT. IF I HIT YOU SO HARD, YOUR FAITH WILL WAVER. LET’S CONTINUE WITH HOW WE HAVE BEEN DOING IT. THE GRADUAL PROCESS”.
“No daddy! Hit me with hammer. I don’t want to ever have a record of disobeying my Charming Silas. I don’t want to ever rebel against him in this relationship. So I want you to hit my pride into pieces. Grind it into powder. Let there be no single trace of pride in me.
Daddy, I know you can do it. Please do it. I’m the one asking you to do it. I won’t complain. I promise you”, I said within me.
“OKAY! I’LL HIT YOU A LITTLE HARD. IF YOU CAN KEEP TO YOUR WORD AND STAY HUMBLE, I’LL DO AS YOU SAY. BUT IF YOU WAVER A LITTLE BIT. I’LL QUICKLY REDUCE THE HEAT AND GO BACK TO THE NORMAL WAY.
AS YOU SABI MAKE MOUTH, MAKE WE SEE WHETHER YOU GO FIT DO WETIN YOU TALK”.
“Daddy, I won’t fail you”, I replied smiling.
“SO BEG MY SON LET ME KNOW WHETHER I’LL TOUCH HIS HEART TO ALLOW YOU GIVE THE MONEY OR NOT”.
“Daddy please let him allow me give the girls their money. I don’t want their trouble”.
“IT’S UP TO YOU SISTER SUBMISSIVE WIFE. BEG YOUR HUSBAND!”
“Cris, are you there?” Silas asked.
Wow! Daddy had taken me out of this world that I forgot I was on the phone.
“I’m sorry Prince Charming! I wanted to plead with you to please allow me send the money”,
“Christy, we’ll talk about later. There’s something else I want to tell you”,
“Charming, please na!”
“I said no”, he replied giggling.
“Pretty pleaseeeeee…..!” I said stressing the word.
“And Charming says no. N. O. You’re not giving anyone anything”.
“Hei! Chineke mee oh!” I was forced to speak Igbo.
“Wow! So you can speak Igbo?”
“No, just some few exclamations in Igbo”, I answered.
“So, I wanted to tell you something”, he said putting my whole pleading stuff aside.
“Daddy please na! Touch his heart”, I said within me.
“YOU DIDN’T BEG WELL! I WASN’T SATISFIED WITH YOUR BEGGING!”
“Chai! Daddy don’t do this to me na! Ejor! Biko! Please na! I’m begging you in 3 languages. Yoruba, Igbo and English”.
“I DIDN’T SAY BEG ME, I SAID BEG YOUR HUSBAND. YOU’RE BUSY WASTING TIME”.
He said and I could feel the Holy Spirit laughing within me.
I had to do my begging very well ooo. I had to change strategy.
“My Charming Silas! The love of my life! The man that moves my heart so much! The gateman of my heart! My charming and only Silas!”
“Ewooooooo! This woman go kill me ooooo!” He screamed at the other end.
I burst into laughter. I could hear the ladies hissing already. Whoa, looks like I had just exposed my relationship with Silas to Maggie. Chai! E don happen ooo. Wetin I go do now? I had kept them waiting and was on the phone with Silas.
“When a woman approaches her man this way, it means she wants him to do something for her. What is it my queen. Ask for anything, even unto the half of my kingdom and it shall be done unto thee”,
“Just permit me!” I replied smiling sheepishly. My cheeks were already aching me from smiling too much.
“Your request is hereby granted. You are free to send the money!”
“Hurray! Woohooooooooo!” I squealed in excitement.
“Thank you so much Charming! I love you afresh!”
“I love you more!”
“I love you most”.
“And I love you more than most”.
“I love you more than the most of more”, I replied.
“Chai! CEO! This your English go kill housefly oooo!” He replied laughing so hard.
I couldn’t help but laugh myself.
One of the girls tapped the table and I realized I had kept the girls waiting. I was so lost in the conversation with the love of my life that I forgot there were people seated before me.
“Charming, let me return to the people I want to speak with. I’ll get back to you.
“Okay my Angelic Christy! My one special epitome of beauty. The lady that did not only stole my heart, but loved me unconditionally. I don’t know what you saw in me that made you fall in love with me. But I promise to continue loving you no matter what.
I was just blushing like a new bride. Chai God! This love dey sweet me ooo!
“Let me allow you go back to work”, he said.
“Charming!” I called with my tiny feminine voice.
“Your baby girl is hungry ooo! When are you going to take me out?” I asked.
“Cris!” Maggie tapped the table.
“Ohhhhhh! Why does this conversation have to end? I’m in heaven already. Don’t bring me back to this world. This world is not my home”.
“Don’t worry, I’m working on a surprise for you! I’ll soon take you out and spoil you with love!”
“Really?”
“Cris!” Maggie tapped the table again.
“Please don’t disturb me jare!” I said to her.
“Who is disturbing my beautiful Angelic Christy over there?” He asked.
“It’s this one!” I said and pointed at Maggie.
“Tell her to be careful ooo!”
“Don’t mind her jare!” I said and bad eyed her.
I saw the frown on her face or should I say, the mockery smile. She clapped her hands and hissed several times.
I knew I had alot of explanation to do after this call.
“Alright, let me release you”.
“Yes ooo! Because one na serious capture you capture me oooo. I’m your willful prisoner of love!”
“Jesus!” He said and burst into laughter.
“Oya! Prison doors are open. Start going before they will all say Oga Silas done charm our CEO”,
“Na beta charm be that na! Wetin go make CEO leave everyone for her gateman? No be charm be that?”
“Christy go oooo!” He said admist laughter.
“Are you pursuing me?”
“No! But please go back to work”,
“So when are you taking me out?”
“God what have I done to this girl? God please tell her to go na!”
“You go find trouble na! You go tell Christy say you love her. Now the love don dey shak Christy. See what you did to an innocent baby girl like me. A harmless baby girl like me”, I said and began to sob playfully.
He laughed so hard that I contacted the laughing disease, if at all there was one.
“Christiana go na! As a CEO, you need to focus on running the affairs of the company”.
“Cris ooooo!” Maggie tapped the table repeatedly.
“CRIS! E DON DO ABEG! NA BEG I DEY BEG YOU! DADDY IS BEGGING YOU! CHAI! CRIS, YOU ALMOST GOT DADDY JEALOUS”, Came the gentle whisper.
I burst into another round of laughter. I laughed so hard that tears flowed down my cheeks.
“Okay charming! I’ll call you back. Bye Prince Charming!” I said.
“Ha! At last! God thank you ooo”, he said on the other end.
“YOU’RE WELCOME MY SON”, Came the gentle whisper.
I almost fell off the chair laughing.
“Bye Christy baby!” He said and that was how the call ended.
“God have mercy!” Bunmi said.
“This is more than incantation!” Maggie said.
“Silas must be the son of a powerful herbalist. The charm is too powerful!” Bunmi added.
“As in Ehn”.
“Yes ooo! He’s the son of a woman great herbalist. The herbalist that is greater than all the herbalist in the whole world put together. It was his dad that gave him the charm that he used on me’, I said admist laughter.
To be continued……
Na God help me finish this episode.
Laugh no wan nearly allow me finish am.
Cris, I sha like your grammar ooo. Is like you go teach me.
So Cris said God should use hammer on her to break her pride. Let’s see what is waiting for her as answer to that prayer
Please the wedding planning committee. How far na?
Please we need to find the Herbalist that gave Silas that charm.
