© Ayo Omolayo
“God please have mercy on me! Have mercy on me! Have mercy on me! Be my father which you already are! Be my rock and my salvation. I will lift up my hands to the rock that has no end,! The defeat that happened to the devil!”
I opened my eyes and looked at the clock, it was five minutes past 11am.
Jesus is Lord! When am I going to eat na! Gid show me mercy! Even Ella had left the house as early as possible. I’m left only with this evil woman that calls herself Susan! She’s like Lucifer! Very beautiful, but full of deadly poison.
After this one hour prayers, I would pack all my things and leave her room. She locked me up in the room and told me if I don’t pray for at least one hour, no food.
Worms want to kill me here! I will faint ooo!
“Oh God my father! Eternal rock of ages. My shield and buckler”
I checked the clock again. It was 7 minutes past 11am.
“God prove to your daughter that you love her and deliver her from hunger! Jesus have mercy! I will die ooo!
“Why not sing for 30 minutes and use the remaining 30 minutes to pray?” Came a deceptive suggestion.
“No Juliet! Prayers and singing are two different things. They want you to pray not to sing”, came a countering advice.
“They want to kill me abeg! please deliver me!” I said almost crying.
Soon the door opened and Susan walked in. I quickly began to shake my head as if I was in serious prayers.
She looked at me and smiled. How did I know? Sheybi if you’re praying, you close your eyes? For you to know say na play I dey play no be pray.
I actually opened an eye to spy on her and I was glad she didn’t catch me. Thank God she didn’t. She left the room again and I felt this calamity that befell me would never end. How did I get into this mess? Oh God! Show me mercy! Rescue me from the hands of them that oppress me.
I check the time again and it was twelve minutes past 11am. Please I need to faint. Someone show me a good spot where I can faint.
I stood up and walked up to the door and began to bang it.
“Susan! Get me out of here! I can’t do this anymore! I can’t continue like this! I feel like dying”.
Nobody answered. I banged and banged until all I could do was to tell myself nobody was going to help me out of this mess.
“Why not sing for one hour and tell them you spent one hour praying. Singing is also part of prayer”, came the deceptive suggestion.
“Sometimes while praying, God can put a song in your heart to sing. But this one is different. You’re using songs to steal time and later tell the whole world that you prayed for one hour. This one is different. It’s not that it’s not good to sing while praying, but you’re manipulating your time through songs. That one is no longer a Spiritual worship but carnal”, came the gentle whisper.
“So how do I pray?” I asked within me.
Then a scripture we once read in church popped in my head.
“Romans 8:11 But if the Spirit of him that raised up Jesus from the dead dwell in you, he that raised up Christ from the dead shall also quicken your mortal bodies by his Spirit that dwelleth in you”.
I shook my head in regret.
“No! I cannot pray! I’m too weak and tired! I’m too hungry to pray!”
“You can do it Juliet! With God all things are possible! Don’t limit God! Those who will get results from God are those who never give up on him. Those who would not accept a no as an answer. Those who won’t stop until God answers
The bible says in Hebrews 10:38. Now the just shall live by faith: but if any man draw back, my soul shall have no pleasure in him.
And remember that other version you read the other day in school, the easy english version says
The person that I have accepted as right will live. That person will live because he trusts me. But if anyone is afraid and he turns back, I will not be happy with that person.
Juliet don’t give up. God cannot help you except you pray. God is limited in your life until you pray. God cannot help you to pray, he only helps you as you persist in the prayers. You are the one to open the mouth and allow him fill it. He will send you help. Just don’t relent! Keep those lips moving. Don’t let the devil stop them. That spirit telling you prayers is too difficult is a liar”.
It was as if someone was talking to me. And I knew it was the Holy Spirit talking. But I was not feeling like praying at all. I was just feeling too tired for everything. I was angry with Susan for putting me through this and with Ella for doing nothing to stop her. I was also angry mummy Toyin left the house and kept me under the care of these wicked people.
I was not just ready to give this a try. I just wanted my food and do this prayer later.
So I found myself knowing the truth, but refusing to obey the truth. I was just allowing my feeling get the better side of me.
“You can do this! Give it all you’ve got!” Came the voice.
“I’ll try it later! I can’t pray!”
“As a man thinketh in his heart so is he! Change your pattern of thinking and start believing you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you”.
“I cannot!” I said and exhaled.
“Juliet! Stop frustrating the grace of God! The grace will never work until you yield yourself to the Holy Spirit. You will never be able to pray until you yield yourself to the spirit of prayer. Until you tell yourself that you will pray until that one hour is completed you will not stop. That’s when the spirit of prayer will come to help you as you pray.
Those who back out never get to experience this manifestation of praying grace. Please don’t frustrate me Juliet! See how I’m working hard trying to persuade you”.
I shook my head, feeling sorry for myself.
“Holy Ghost! Maybe some other time we would pray. Not today! I’m too tired. I’m just too tired and hungry to do anything. I just want to eat!”
“That’s what you want! Your food right?”
“Yes! I don’t need anything! I just want my food!”
“Have you forgotten your destiny will never come to pass until you master the art of prayer?”
“I know that very well! Prayer is the key! But I can’t kill myself! How will they tell me to pray for one hour? Why are they wicked like this?”
“Forget about them! Let’s focus on you. How can you be completely different from your father?”
“How?”
“Your father said man shall not live by bread alone, but you’re saying you want your food?”
“God! I know I’m a big disappointment to you, but I just can’t do it right now. Maybe later! Please!”
“Have it your way!” Came the gentle reply mixed with sadness.
I knew he was sad. I just knew he was. I could feel it the same way his sadness was making me feel sad.
Soon the door opened and this time it was mummy that appeared at the entrance.
Where had she been all these while? If she was here, I wouldn’t have gone through all this. It’s after I have finished struggling with the Holy Spirit and succeeded in having my own way, that’s when she showed up.
She stood at the entrance, hands akimbo, staring down at me.
“He said you told him you wanted to eat”.
Fear gripped me. I looked at her like I was seeing a ghost.
“Mummy! What did you say?” I asked as I drifted a few feet away from her.
“Didn’t you just send him away a few minutes ago?” She asked.
I bowed my head and began to weep.
“You can go to the kitchen! Your delicious food whom thou lovest with all thine heart is on the kitchen counter waiting for you. Go and eat to the satisfaction of thine soul”.
I burst into tears. I screamed so loud in tears that the whole house could hear my scream.
“God! Why is prayer so hard?” I wept.
I heard hurried footsteps. I knew it was the girls.
“Stay back!” I heard mummy’s voice.
“He said I should tell you that if you want to be a strong clay in his hand, get ready to meet the breaking hammer of God. He will break you untill you melt completely in his hands.
God has chosen you right from your mother’s womb and called you before the foundations of the earth. If you chose to be stubborn like Jonah, you will still end up doing what he asked you to do. But the only thing is that you would do it after suffering in the belly of the whale.
So, he said I should ask you. Will you do it willingly, or would you love to do it after suffering in the belly of the whale?
Don’t forget to go and eat your food. You know it’s more important to you than praying”, she said and left.
I looked and saw the girls staring at me.
“Go on and eat your food. You can rest now! Remember you will do it another day!” Came the deceptive suggestion.
I knew eating that food would be eating poison. I was already depressed for the terrible things I had said to God. I wasn’t ready to get him annoyed any further.
With tears in my eyes, I stood up and shut the door by myself. Without saying a word to the girls staring at me.
I went down on my knees. It was already twenty five minutes past one. I bowed my face to the ground and began to ask God for mercy.
“Lord! I don’t want to be too hard for you. I don’t want to be too difficult for you. I know you have destined me to do great things. I don’t want to fail my generation. Daddy! Please help me! Help me pay the price for my destiny.
I cannot continue like this. To be honest with you! Lord I want to be honest! I hate prayer. I don’t like praying at all. I prefer sleeping, watching American movies, eating, chatting with friends on social media than spending time praying.
I want to be honest with you! Lord! I don’t like reading the bible! Sorry I’m using this word! The bible is too boring. It looks like a story book to me. What I’m after is a complete new story to read. I love reading stories, but I don’t like reading the same story twice.
So to read the story of David and Goliath again is a serious challenge to me. To read about Samson and Delilah again is a challenge. If you could write a new bible, maybe I would read it, but this one you wrote is too old, with boring stories.
God! I know I’m not supposed to be saying all these but, I want you to consider me. I mean!’ what am I even saying sef!” I said and exhaled.
“Oh baby girl! Go chop jare! See the nonsense prayer you dey pray!” Came the deceptive suggestion.
“Juliet, you can pretend before men. But the only person you should never lie to is your God. Whether you’re saying rubbish is none of my business.
Do you want to be helped?”
“Yes! I need help!”
“Give me one hour everyday! Can you do that for me?”
“Yes sir! I’m ready to do what you want me to do”.
“Prayers solves a lot of problems with your soul structure. What you’re experiencing is the distaste the flesh has for the things of the spirit. So your flesh is seriously fighting you from engaging in anything spiritual.
It takes discipline to force the flesh into obeying you and doing what your spirit wants, which is prayer”.
By the time I came out to eat, it was 3:45pm.
To be continued……….
The problem many of you have is not that you don’t know the truth. You have read so many stories. Infact, you’re waiting for the next story to be posted.
But you never obey a single instruction those stories gave you. Many of you want to obey! You want to pray! You want to observe your quiet time. But you just don’t want to do it now. You want to do it later.
Acts 24:24. And after certain days, when Felix came with his wife Drusilla, which was a Jewess, he sent for Paul, and heard him concerning the faith in Christ.
Verse 25. And as he reasoned of righteousness, temperance, and judgment to come, Felix trembled, and answered, Go thy way for this time; when I have a convenient season, I will call for thee.
Felix never called Paul again. That convenient season to serve God that he was looking for, never came. He died an unsaved man.
Satan is ready to keep wasting your time for you. He’s ready to keep telling you to do it later. Pray another day. Take your spiritual life serious fromm beginning tomorrow.
Soon, you’ll discover it’s September and you’ve not made any spiritual progress. From January till September, no progress.
Get up and start building your relationship with God now! Now is the accepted time.
If you don’t learn how to pray now! You will learn it later in the belly of the whale.
