Jake sat behind the desk in the private study as he stared at nothing in particular. A deep frown was etched on his face. The words which Jade had said that day at the hospital has completely unsettled him. He couldn’t shake her words off his mind. Her words kept pricking his heart like a thousand pins and he was completely swallowed by guilt.No matter how many times he had told himself that all this didn’t matter, he was also aware he was just lying to himself.How did all this start in the first place? How did the confident playboy, Jake Beau, who had never played such tricks just to win a woman result to lying and pretence?Was it because he knew Jade was not like his usual women, and that she’ll never fall for him like the rest of them that has prompted him into opting for such silly and stupid ideas? He was beginning to regret every action he has taken since the night he met Jade.That girl was pulling so many weight in his heart, and he didn’t know why that was. He didn’t know why he couldn’t stop himself, why he wanted to see her, why her words were tormenting him. When he was not with her, he craved for her presence and even when he was, he craved for more. It was more like he couldn’t get enough of her and something in him kept pressing for more. All this thoughts were eating him up, but Jake was certain of one thing and that was never losing Jade. He wanted her by his side at all times.From his conversation with Jade he was certain he didn’t stand a chance of being close to her especially when his actions has made him the exact person she despised.But what does this mean for him? Will he not have a chance of being close to her at all? Could all this be rectified?He didn’t know if he should be grateful for asking that question or not.’Did she say she didn’t have boyfriend? How was that even possible? Then who were those guys that he had seen her with?’ ‘Jake that’s the least of your problem’ he chided himself.He couldn’t forget the way she replied each if his question like she was being asked the most difficult question of her life.~~~~~~”Do you have a boyfriend?” Jake anxiously asked. His heart thumping hard when he saw the way Jade suddenly looked at him like that was an off limit question, but his nervousness didn’t reflect on his face. He tried to remain as calm as possible.Jade stared at him unflinchingly. She looked at Jake like she was trying to decipher his reason behind asking such a question.”What did you say?” Jade asked just to be sure she didn’t hear him wrong.’Were they that close that they could now talk about something so personal?’Jake knew Jade did hear him and she was obviously shocked that he’d ask such a question.”Do – you have a boyfriend?” Jake forced himself to ask again. Jade’s firm and inscrutable gaze on him was making his anxiety grow by the second.Of course Jade had heard him the first time, she just wanted to be sure if that was the question he wanted to ask.Jade continued to stare at him like she was accessing if he was someone she could give that answer to.She couldn’t be blamed. The man before her was a national man whore and been asked such a question by him would set so many alarms in the head of someone like Jade. And secondly, she had doubts regarding his intentions of being around her, maybe that could be attributed to the fact that they had an unpleasant history between them.On a second thought, Jake has in one way or the other proved her wrong. In the few times they have spent together he has not acted the way she has expected him to. On the contrary, he has behaved responsible and mature around her, and from his behavior he didn’t look like he had any hidden agenda, but that could not also be trusted right?”Why do you ask?” Jade asked back, her eyes locked to his.”I’m sorry if my question made you uncomfortable believe me its not my intention to do so. I – i just want to ask that I don’t have answers and I desperately need them. They may be personal to you too and that’s because I think they might help provide answers to the millions of questions troubling me” Jake answered tactfully. He didn’t have the proper answer to her questions. He was sure if he said the things in his mind, he’d never get the answer he wanted. Jade continued to look at him, she was not sure if his answer sufficed it, but she felt like there was nothing bad in giving him the answer to his questions.Jake was beginning to regret asking Jade that question, because the dread of Jade saying ‘yes’ suddenly engulfed him, making him unwilling to get that answer.”No” Jade replied with a firm voice that sounded so assuring that she had said nothing but the truth.If it were to be any other girl Jake might have considered the fact that she might be lying. He has seen several girls do that before just so they could be with him. But that was not the case for Jade. This girl has been so aloof towards him that he’d think she somehow hated him. She didn’t look like the type who would say something or do anything that she wasn’t comfortable with just to please someone, most especially him.”Have you ever been around someone that you enjoy being with, so much that you’d want the day to go by slowly, and you don’t know the reason why?” Jake asked again. He could feel his heart race each time he asked a question, but somehow he couldn’t stop himself. He wanted to do this more than anything, know the answer to the questions he had no answers to, and also answers to the questions he has long been dying to know. For instance, why was she crying and running under the rain that day at the hospital. Why did she sleep with him? Did she do that for somebody? If she did, then who?These questions might be irrelevant to someone else but to him they meant alot. But he also knew for now he couldn’t go as far as asking those questions.Jade was yet again surprised by his question.’Why all this questions?’ Jade thought.But before she could open her mouth to ask that out loud, Jake started, “I know am not supposed to ask you these questions. But I feel like you’re the only one who has the answers to the kind of questions I want to ask. I do have friends I could ask, but I doubt if they’ll ever be able to provide me with the answers I need” Because in the first place they don’t have them. All his questions were centered around Jade.Jade considered his words and she felt slightly convinced by it. For someone like himself who had a bad reputation she doubted if he ever has any reasonable friends. They all must be like him, like they said, birds of same feathers flock together.Jade contemplated if she should continue answering his questions. This questions were sort of personal and answering them might make her sort of vulnerable.She turned around to trash the food packs in the trash can. She looked back at Jake before taking her seat close to him. Jake stared at her in silence as she also returned his gaze.”I did have that kind of someone at a time” She started while Jake fixed his eyes on her as she lowered her eyes down.”The feeling at the time was indescribable. At the very beginning I couldn’t even understand them at the time, but I was sure I wanted more, and even when I got it, it still wasn’t good enough.That feeling envelopes you and makes you feel like you can’t do anything without thinking about that person. You’re not doing much, but every little thing matters and could make your heart swell. At least mine did at the time” She said with that sad smile, Jake was starting to hate.”But mine just didn’t last…or maybe it lasted for too long and I was suddenly set free from the silliness of it” Jade said with indignation. Jake could feel the anger behind her voice but that didn’t stop him from asking another question.”But why?” He asked curiously. His curiosity was piqued not by her words but by the emotions at which she said those words. Jade’s eyes shoot up and glanced at him in confusion. “Why it didn’t last?” She asked while Jake nodded.”Because I was lied to” Jade paused as she looked intensely at him like she was about to give him the most toughest lesson of life.”Believe me Mr Jake no one likes being lied to, even those that lie hate lies. To me nothing hurts more than lies because it’s equivalent to betrayal.. If you’re asking this because you have that kind of a person in your life, I’d advice you stay as true as possible, because that person deseves only the truth” Jade said with intense seriousness.________”A Penny for your thoughts” Jake heard his grandfather say as he sneakily walked into the study. Jake looked up at him with a sullen expression on his face.Jake was still so lost on what to do about the mess he has created for himself. He still hasn’t figured anything out yet. Today was a Saturday, a day he was supposed to meet Jade as per their usual arrangement, but he couldn’t bring himself to. He has been sitting in the study since he woke up and got himself ready this morning.”A penny won’t cover it” Jake said with a frustrated sigh.Grandfather Beau observed his grandson’s depressed look. The gloomy look on his face was one he hasn’t seen before. Whatever was troubling Jake might be quiet serious, because he has never seen him ponder about something this hard. As a matter of fact he has never seen Jake in the study during the day, the man mostly used it at night and obviously there was no file on the desk so it couldn’t be work related.”I guess it must be serious then. Tell this grandfather of yours what it is, he might be able to help you” Grandfather Beau said with a small smile as he took his seat across the desk. Jake looked at his grandfather as he contemplated telling him about the issue troubling him at heart. Even if he wanted to, where should he start?Jake sighed again as he tore his gaze from his grandfather and his eyes coincidentally fell on the picture frame of his grandparents hanging on the wall.’Maybe his grandfather might actually be of help and could render him some words of wisdom’ He thought.”Grandfather have you ever done something you wished you never did?” He asked as he kept his gaze fixed on the frame.Grandfather Beau followed his line of sight and nodded when he saw what Jake was looking at. “To your grandmother?” Grandfather Beau asked, making Jake snap his neck back to him as he stared at his Grandfather.”No…Yes. I mean to anybody at all” He said confusedly. He didn’t know if comparing how his grandfather felt towards his grandmother and how he felt towards Jade was something comparable. He highly doubted it.The level of guilt his grandfather might have towards his grandmother and the one which he was having towards Jade were totally incomparable. Because his grandfather loved his wife who happens to be his grandmother. But with him and Jade…he still doesn’t know, but he was certain it wasn’t love.He didn’t think he was capable of something like that.Grandfather Beau nodded silently as he observed Jake’s struggle towards admitting whatever he was going through at the moment. He didn’t know exactly what Jake might be going through, but he had a familiar feeling about it. It must have something to do with a woman.”Well Jake, it depends on who I’m dealing with. Is the person a business partner? Probably I might not feel much guilt or even nothing at all, because all is fair in business. I taught you that” He paused to observe Jake’s reaction.”But what if it’s not a business partner?” Jake asked inquisitively. He was sure he wouldn’t be bothered if this was work related. He knew the business grounds well, therefore he wouldn’t be so stupid as to feel guilty towards a business partner or rival.”Jake what did you do?” Grandfather Beau asked with concern. Jake has never been like this before. The young man was acting weird and unnatural.”Grandfather it doesn’t matter what I did. Just assume you did something bad and whatever you did was what the other party hated more than death itself. And this person you don’t want to hurt whoever it is…so what would you do?” Jake asked again, desperation was written in his eyes.Grandfather Beau sighed exasperatedly, he was certain Jake would never explain what this was all about, and there was no need trying to force it out of him. He’d give his candid advice and hopefully that would be able to help him solve his problem.”If I did something bad, and what I did the other person detests it so badly, and I also don’t want to lose this person as well, what would I do?” Grandfather said slowly as if he was in deep thought, when actually he was only trying to get back at Jake for trying to hide the main subject of the matter from him. Grandfather knew his silence was making Jake anxious, and he liked it. It wasn’t everyday he got an opportunity like this.Jake caught onto his grandfather’s antics and he growled in a low voice, “Grandfather?” His eyes were somewhat threatening.”Tch..you’re no fun” Grandfather Beau rolled his eyes while Jake’s face turned stoic.”Jake the only solution towards this is facing your problem by coming out clean. Confess to what you’ve done wrong and ask for forgiveness. If this person really despise what you’ve done the most in this world, then it’s better if the truth comes from you, that way it would be easier to forgive you. Because if the truth came from some other source, it would mean you are a terrible person and forgiving you maybe hard or even next to impossible. So come out clean and own your crime. And most importantly when asking for forgiveness, mean it. Be completely and honestly sincere…nothing moves a woman’s heart than your sincerity” Grandfather Beau said hinting on the word ‘woman’ which he had used, but Jake has suddenly fallen in to deep thoughts that he didn’t have much time to ponder on it or probably refute it.”Would that do?” Grandfather Beau asked cutting through Jake’s thought, making Jake subconsciously.”Thank you grandfather” Jake said with a small smile as he sprang up to his feet. He picked up his keys, bowed slightly to his grandfather before starting for the door.”Jake” Grandfather Beau called halting Jake on his strides.He turned to look at him, “She must be a good girl. Don’t ruin this one” Grandfather Beau adviced . Jake stared at him ready to refute what his grandfather had just said. ‘When did i say it was a girl?’ He asked himself. He opened his mouth to deny that it wasn’t related to a girl even though he knew he would be lying, but then he could only say, “See you around grandfather” making Grandfather Beau flash him a knowing smile.He wouldn’t be their guardian and grandfather if he didn’t know his own grandsons well.Jake sent a quick text to Jade asking if he should pick her up at home or at the bus stop as he headed for the garage. And soon Jade reply came.”Bus stop it is” He said as he picked up the pace. He was dying to rectify this problem at once. What would Jade think of him if she finds out about his lies?
WATCHOUT FOR EPISODE 60
